Why the Dress Code is Wack

By Sofia Bonno, Staff Writer

**DISCLAIMER: This piece is a work of satire published in our April Fools Edition. It does not necessarily reflect the opinions of the writer, the staff, or AHS.

Oppression. Tyranny. Patriarchy. These words are synonymous for dress code. Every regulation forced upon women and girls is a mockery of the years we have worked to fight for equality. Dress code is worse than bigotry; it’s fascism.

In this day and age, how can schools expect a teenage girl to abide by such ridiculous demands of wearing shirts or pants? This is 2017 people! When are public high schools going to open their eyes and realize the extent of their sexism? Clothes are just the shackles of a society ruled by men. All these rules we hear about no tank tops, no hats, and no substitution of clothes for body paint are the reason we cannot have a healthy learning environment. We will not be free from this toxicity until the administrators of AHS realize how damaging it is to a growing teenage girl’s self esteem to tell her to dress semi-professionally to ‘maintain an appropriate learning space’.

“Yeah, when I was in high school, I got dress-coded because I wore plastic wrap as pants. This is why I hate men,” Kanye West, a former high school student, said.

Did Amelia Earhart become a woman pilot so that her granddaughter could be sent home from school because she wore a bikini top instead of an ‘acceptable’ shirt? Did Lena Dunham defend Taylor Swift so that girls in schools could be punished for wearing undergarments as outerwear? Did Beyonce dance in front of a giant flashing “FEMINISM” sign so that men could be allowed to stare at a girl who wears spandex as pants? Did Michelle Obama ruin our lunches to make American teenagers skinnier so that we couldn’t show off how in shape we are now?

Men need to stop sexualizing women and let us wear what we want to. A nude teenage girl in a classroom is not inappropriate; it’s inappropriate for you to comment on it. However, as we all know, men should not be allowed to be shirtless in school for that would be far too distracting to the female students. Male students obviously need boundaries, but a dress code for female students is always oppressive.

“It’s been too long since dress code focused on boys instead of girls. I say we should only have rules for what male students can wear. Girls should be allowed to wear as little as they want,” , a grown man with a fedora, said.

In short, it’s time for us girls to fight for our rights. Ladies, strip down to the bare necessities and prove to your school that dress codes will never stop you from pursuing your dream as a nudist. We are the future of America and no patriarchal dress code will tell us that underage girls have to wear pants in public.

Photo Credits: Public Domain

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